Letter #2 Mrs. Thing

Dear Mrs. Thing,

You deserve so much more than a little letter. I can’t even imagine what you might think if you received something like this in the mail.

So, you are the one everyone in therapy blames, and I totally see why.

It’s because of you I learned maladaptive ways of coping. It’s because of you I learned how to fix most of my maladaptive ways of coping because I’m I was blessed with some brains that made me smart enough to realize you were wrong in a lot of the “guidance” you provided. It’s because of you my husband suffers from collateral damage syndrome. That’s a thing I made up after I could see the effects of my mood and behavior had on my partner after spending time with you. I’m your target and your venom spreads to another undeserving person in ways I haven’t been able to control yet. It’s because of you I’m half dead inside. It’s because of you I learned what a narcissist is.

You see, according to you there is nothing more important than yourself. There are no viewpoints that can rival yours. And the biggest paradox of all, despite your level of self-involvement you have zero insight. It’s maddening to witness, especially to someone who suffers your wrath. To make things worse you’re now dependent on others to do so many things for you, yet you claim you’re independent. When things are done to assist you there’s always room for criticism. Your self-importance has been an overwhelming presence in the vicinity of your humble minions for over half a century and has proven to be so strong it transcends your obviously addled mind. Seriously, I ought to salute you for maintaining your obnoxious, condescending, criticizing, mean behavior as you stand in the midst of dementia while the flames of hell beckon you to join the legions of nasty, hateful souls that never bothered to even attempt to traverse the road to self actualization.

Yes, I salute you for feeling superior while you are oblivious to the fact that you are exactly the opposite of who you think you are. You shine in the words Thomas Gray wrote, “ignorance is bliss…’tis folly to be wise.”

Must be nice for you. Sucks for the rest of us.

The End